You Too Can Be a POWERFUL HUMAN TRANQUILIZER
Doesn't that look like the most satisfying hug? Did you know that the human hug has tremendous power?
Yesterday I mentioned how holding my ADD husband's hand during a movie helped him to stay focused on the movie and enjoy the entire show without missing important parts of the plot.
The challenge with the ADD person is not only keeping their attention, it is also getting their attention in the first place. They often don't even look at you while you are speaking, their eyes are usually all over the place, along with their minds.
Touching can help you to get their attention before you even speak. So, take that person's hand, rub it a little bit, and then ask them to look at you. They usually will. This will usually stop the distractions momentarily, long enough for you to communicate with them.
There is another good reason why touching is so important to the ADD person. Being ADD is not a nice thing, it is awful! Many people with ADD feel like failures. Not being able to concentrate means usually not being able to accomplish all of the things you want to. It usually means a lot of unfinished projects. It often means feeling like a big fat failure!
Touching them now and then, makes them feel human, validated, important, and cherished. This touching can work both ways. If the ADD person in your life is driving you nuts, you may not feel like touching them at all. You may be angry with them since their behaviours make your life difficult. Touching can diffuse some of your anger towards them, and remind you that even though they do have some annoying behaviours, you love them!
And besides, we all have annoying behaviours, not just people with ADD.
This is a particularly challenging aspect of my own marriage. With a mental disorder of my own, bipolar disorder, sometimes I do not want to see, hear or least of all touch anyone! The good news is that my husband has made it as much a point to understand my disorder as I have to understand his, and so, with a lot of love and understanding, and God's grace, we do manage.
The ultimate form of human touch is the hug, a full frontal body to body hug, bodies touching, arms wrapped around one another, heads meeting. If you want to do a bit of study into the power of the human hug read "The Power of a Hug". There is so much more about the human hug if you care to do a little research.
Let's face it, we all need human touch. How easy it can be to forget that....
The pastor at our church seems to do a pretty good job at getting Cliff's attention. He usually mentions hockey (one of Cliff's main interests) somewhere in the sermon, and often right at the beginning. He uses overhead images as well and so there is something else going on at the same time, and provides some distractions.
Now, here is a silly thing! For the ADD person, sometimes a little distraction can actually help them focus! Just how does that work? I will tell you about it tomorrow!
WHAT ABOUT YOU? How are you feeling? Have you had a hug today? Do you have someone in your life with ADD? Does touching help? Does touching get YOUR attention?
Don't give up! There is hope for depression. There is also hope for ADD.
