Medication Makeover Gone Bad

Medication Makeover gone bad?

I mean, why don't I just give up?

Because 

"I CAN'T give up!"

Last week I suggested that there are times when dealing with depression,

that we might try a medication makeover.

In theory this is a good idea and for some people can make all of the difference.

That is what I have been doing this past week and I promised to share the results with you.

Unfortunately for me, most medications either don't work, or give me unbearable side effects.

And yet every time I hit a low patch of depression, instead of riding out the storm,

off I go to the doctor

seeing if we could try something new.

How many times do I have to learn this lesson?

With this new medication, instead of feeling less depressed I began to feel more depressed!

And yet, this has been a good exercise to remind me that,

for my own personal unique experience, medication is not the only answer.

I keep notes on all of this stuff and have read them all over this week,

only to realize that nothing much has changed over time!

My notes reminded me of something.

I was reminded that I can't always follow the 'recommended dosage'

when starting a new medication.

I had forgotten that.

I have to go much slower, sometimes even cutting in half the smallest of pills.

So instead of quiting, that's what I did, cut the pills in half.

In a few days I was feeling much less awful.

I will continue with this med, hoping to increase it over time.

In my case, because I have bipolar depression,

this medication is supposed to bring my high moods down,

just not down too far.

I already take something that is supposed to bring my low moods up but again,

I can only tolerate a small dose of that.

But if my moods go too far up, there is only one reaction, to crash down to a really low mood.

Bipolar is kind of like diabetes, there is no cure, just management.

But I won't give up!

Each week when I say to you

'Don't give up. There is hope for depression!'

I mean don't give up hoping that there is help for depression.

Don't give up finding new ways to cope.

Don't give up reaching out to others that may help.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

How are you feeling today?

Is it time for a medication change?

Or is it time to remind yourself what works and what doesn't?

Don't give up, there is hope for depression!