Step-Parenting with Success!

Successful step parenting - easier said than done!

When I married for the second time, I had already raised two daughters who were off to university. My new husband had three teenagers who lived with us half the time. I was motivated and determined and hopeful to have a positive relationship with them.

Just let me set the record straight. My stepchildren, now 36, 34 and 32, are three of the nicest people I know. 



These kids had not been accustomed to helping around the house and yet, I knew that if they didn't do a little something, I would resent them and that would not be good for them or me. I needed to get some help from them but I wanted to give all of us the opportunity to experience success.

So, I suggested three different jobs and they each chose the one that was the least disagreeable to them. In the meantime however, the kitchen was a big, daily, hourly challenge. Feeding two teenage boys was new for me and they ate all the time, like grazing cattle.

 I soon noticed that starting a task from scratch was challenging for all of them, but if someone got it started, they could easily come alongside and do a great job. So, instead of walking out of a disastrous kitchen mess, I would get it in decent shape and put up this sign:

STK? PKITW!

This was a success. I created a guessing game and a competition at the same time. These bright kids loved puzzles and games, so it all started off to be kind of fun. By the way, these letters stand for:

"SEE THE KITCHEN? PLEASE KEEP IT THAT WAY!"

Since they were competitive, no one wanted to be caught with their dishes being the only ones messing up the kitchen. It made me happy to keep a mess from accumulating and they were kind enough to cooperate.

Success for all of us!

Success is one of the most important starting points in any plan, whether you are dealing with step families or depression. If you don't have success in the beginning, you will quit trying. That's why we need appropriate goals so that we can achieve some level of success. It is important to have success to lead onto more successes.

That's why most diet plans are designed to give you a big loss the first week - they want you to start with success so you won't quit.

We can apply this to our depression management strategies. Set realistic goals, goals that we can be successful at, like my morning hot bath.

WHAT ABOUT YOU? How are you feeling today? Had any successes lately?

Don't give up! There is hope for depression.